


Oh, to Have Our Happy Ending

by IndigoFudge



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Blood and Injury, Eddie Dies But Gets Better, Eddie Kaspbrak Lives, Eddie Kaspbrak Loves Richie Tozier, M/M, Richie Tozier Loves Eddie Kaspbrak, Soft Eddie Kaspbrak
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-19
Updated: 2020-06-19
Packaged: 2021-03-04 05:55:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,901
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24798805
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IndigoFudge/pseuds/IndigoFudge
Summary: Eddie Kaspbrak dies surrounded by his friends.But not for good.He deserves so much more than that.orThey take Eddie out of Neibolt and surprise! He's not really dead!
Relationships: Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier
Kudos: 80





	Oh, to Have Our Happy Ending

**Author's Note:**

> TW for some borderline s**cidal thoughts by Richie near the end. (Only while Eddie is in surgery, don't worry.)

It turns out that seeing the love of your life get impaled in front of you is enough to make a grown man cry. The pain and the fear in Eddie's eyes as he chokes out Richie's name is unbearable. And then Pennywise hurls Eddie into a smaller cavern. Richie is filled with rage hearing Eddie's body smack the rocks as it rolls down the slope.

Running up to Eddie and gently rolling him over - careful not to jar his chest wound - Richie breaks down. “Eds, Eddie, I’m here,” he says. Slowly, he pulls Eddie into his lap, cradling him, ignoring the stares of the other Losers. He won’t let the man he loves die on the cold ground- fuck them all if they think he should.

Eddie’s whole body is shaking as he coughs. Richie steadies him. Fresh blood coats Eddie’s chin.

“Rich,” Eddie gasps out, grimacing. “Richie.” It's hard to tell, but he seems relieved that Richie's here - hopefully not mad that Richie is holding him in his lap. He curls closer, taking a shuddering breath.

“Yeah, buddy?” In Richie's head, Pennywise's voice is warning about his 'dirty little secret' - but Richie squashes it. _Fuck my 'dirty little secret,'_ he thinks. _Eddie needs me._ As softly as he can, Richie pets Eddie’s hair. It's interesting that he can't find it in him to care what Eddie thinks, or what any of the other Losers think for that matter. 

“I’m sorry.” Eddie’s voice is small. “I thought I killed It.”

 _He just put himself in danger to save me, and he's apologizing because he didn't succeed in killing a demon clown._ “Hey, Spaghetti Man, you did,” whispers Richie. “You did. He hurt you and then he stopped moving. He’s dead, don’t you worry.”

The tension melts out of Eddie’s body, and his face relaxes. He smiles. “I killed It? For real?”

If Eddie could have turned his head and looked up at the mouth of the smaller cave, he would have seen that Richie was lying. He would have seen that Pennywise was very much alive. But the blood rushing in Eddie's ears drowns out any noise that the clown might be making.

“Yeah. It was all you.” Richie’s lying through his teeth.

Eddie lets out a contented sigh. His eyes drift closed. _Maybe I am brave,_ he thinks. _Maybe I am worth something._

“You comfortable?” Richie asks. He can feel Eddie sinking further into his lap and he knows that he would die for this man without hesitation, that he would do anything to take Eddie's pain away. “Or should I-“

Eddie feebly curls his fingers around Richie’s wrist. “No. Stay. This is perfect.”

No one needs to ask what it’s ‘perfect’ for.

“You are the bravest person I’ve ever met, Eds,” says Richie.

“I second that.” Bill kneels, placing a hand on Eddie’s knee. “I’m so sorry I y-yelled at you up there. You were just scared, and you didn't d-deserve that. I _sh-sh-shoved_ you." He gets teary-eyed, looking at Eddie with an expression of such extreme sorrow.

 _Please no, please not now, please not_ ever, Eddie thinks. _I don't want to do this. Don't make me say goodbye._ Everyone is surrounding him. He's always been small, but now he feels even smaller. “‘S’okay.” The ghost of a smile appears on his face. "You're okay, Big Bill. I always liked being around you. I, I looked up to you. Kind of wished I could _be_ you sometimes. 'Cause you were the _leader_ , you were _strong,_ you... you weren't like me." He weakly pats Bill’s shoulder, and then lets his hand fall. Bev takes it instead.

“Eds, honey, you are strong. We’re all here, and we love you so much,” she says, tearfully. "I hope you know that. It's- it's all going to be okay. We're not leaving."

Eddie swallows. "Thanks, Bev. Means a lot. I loved you like a sister, you know? Like... we both had pretty shitty parents. We helped each other." He laughs a little, but then grits his teeth as knives of fire twist further into his chest. As the pain ebbs away, he squeezes Bev's hand as tightly as he can.

“I’m sorry I called you back here, Eddie.” Mike sits, too, and touches Eddie’s shoulder. "I didn't mean for you to get hurt, I didn't mean for any of this, I didn't- this is all my fault. I don't think I'll ever be able to forgive myself."

“Don’t apologize for that,” Eddie says. His voice is failing him. So are his lungs - punctured and slowly filling with blood. The pain weighs on him, creeping in from all different directions. "You did... what you had to do. Mikey, listen to me: go be happy. Go to... to Florida. Remember? Leave this shit hole town. But keep an eye on Richie for me, okay?"

Ben is the last one to kneel. “I’m glad I knew you. It was an honor. You are strong and smart and selfless, Eddie, and you- thanks for patching me up when we were kids. You have made me, I mean... a better person. A better man. You've always been there for me, for all of us." He bows his head.

"Glad I knew you too, Haystack." Tears slip from beneath Eddie’s closed eyelids. Of course they like him, but he doubted it sometimes. Hearing things like this cements the fact in his mind that people do care about him - which just makes it all the more difficult to say goodbye. 

Finally, Richie speaks again. “Eds... I... shit. I have to tell you something, and it's been a long time coming, but I've been too scared to say it." He brushes Eddie's tears away. "I’m.... in love with you. I don’t want you to- go- without knowing that.” He tactfully avoids the word ‘die,’ even though they all know what’s coming.

Eddie opens his eyes for this. Warmth floods his veins - his body's last rush of energy, he supposes - bringing feeling back to his fingers. Richie loves him. Even with it being explicitly stated, Eddie finds it hard to believe. People like Richie don't love people like him. It doesn't happen. But the look in Richie's eyes makes him think that maybe there's a chance. With the last of Eddie's strength, he sits up slightly and kisses Richie on the lips for several seconds before falling back, exhausted.

“Idiot,” he breathes, but he’s smiling, eyelids fluttering closed again. “I love you too, Richie.”

Richie’s name is the last word that leaves Eddie’s mouth. He takes one more gasping breath and then he lies still.

Eddie Kaspbrak dies knowing that he is loved.

"Come on, Eds, stay with me. Don't die. Don't _fucking-"_ Richie can't finish his sentence. He'd obviously seen it coming, he'd known it was going to happen; he's not stupid. But now that Eddie is actually dead? That's fucking painful. That is enough to make Richie grab fistfuls of Eddie's dirty blue jacket, like somehow he can pull Eddie back into the living world. " _Eddie._ You don't get to leave me alone, you can't leave me when I just fucking got you back, you _asshole_ _!_ Come _back!_ " His throat and chest are tight, burning with sobs that force their way out of him. "God _fucking_ damn it. _Eds._ "

What happens next comes in five steps:

1\. They kill Pennywise.

The victory isn’t as sweet as it would have been. It's undercut by the grief of losing two out of the seven Losers. Richie - having lost both his best friend and the love of his life in the span of 48 hours - is especially devastated and numb. He collapses to his knees next to Eddie's body and punches Ben in the nose when he tries to pull Richie off.

"Fuck you! I'm not fucking leaving him here!" Richie's voice is raw. "He fucking hates this place, man! He hates the dark, he hates the _sewers_! Don't you remember? Don't you _care_ about him at all? We're not leaving him in the lair of that motherfucking clown!"

Ben flinches. "I-"

"If it were Bev, you'd take her out!" continues Richie. "If you don't take Eddie out, I'm fucking staying! You can't fucking do this to him! Or to me! What kind of a shitty friend are you, Haystack? Jesus fucking Christ!" 

"Okay! I was going to say okay!" Ben picks Eddie up carefully, as if he's just sleeping. "You're right. He doesn't deserve to be left here. Now let's go."

2\. They take Eddie out.

The house is collapsing, and at one point Ben begins to put Eddie down and leave him.

"Richie, the place is coming down. We'll all die if we-"

"Shut the fuck up! You want me to fucking deck you again?" Richie places a shaking hand on Eddie's forehead. "I love him! We are not leaving him to get buried here! He- he needs to be buried under a tree, where we can honor him! What the fuck is wrong with you?"

Richie's words, combined with his broken expression, are enough to make Ben pick Eddie back up. Dust clogs the air and sticks to the blood on Eddie's face.

After they climb up the first well on the way back, a large chunk of stone falls from the ceiling, drenching the Losers with graywater. The force of the wave nearly makes Ben drop Eddie, but Richie dives and catches him before anything else can happen. Water drips from Richie's hair. "You're okay, Eds," he whispers. "You're okay. Haystack's got you." It's nice to pretend sometimes, pretend that the love of his life isn't cold and dead.

3\. They almost don't make it.

Richie's knees give out as soon as he's a safe distance away from the house. He clenches fistfuls of the grass and coughs until his throat is dry. 

Ben lies Eddie's body gently on the ground.

Richie sits next to him and holds his hand. He can barely look at Eddie - mouth slightly open, dark blood on his chin, lips blue - but he does anyway. He owes Eddie that much. _And so much more. I owe him a hero's burial. I owe it to him to carry out his legacy. I owe him a nicely kept grave, maybe not in a cemetery, but one surrounded by wildflowers. He'd like that, I think._

“I wish we could have had a happy ending,” Richie says quietly, placing a kiss on Eddie's temple. "You deserved more than this. You deserved more than to die like this. You deserved to be happy and smile and-" His voice cracks. "Fuck. I always loved your smile." Eddie's smile that had made his eyes scrunch up, that had made his dimples appear. Eddie's smile that Richie regretted not causing more often than he did. 

4\. There is the briefest pressure on Richie's fingers, and he chokes on his next breath. How cruel of the universe to make him think for a second that Eddie isn't dead quite yet? Because Eddie _is_ dead. Richie may be a mess, but he's aware of that, at least. He watched it happen. As much as it tears his heart in two, he knows that the love of his life is gone.

Then Eddie cracks open his eyelids. "H-hey, Richie." 

Richie's eyes refill with tears and his heart stutters inside his chest. "Eds?" _There's no fucking way. There is absolutely no fucking way._ But if there were no fucking way, how would Eddie be smiling up at him with shiny brown eyes?

" _Eds!"_ Richie says again, and then he's putting pressure on Eddie's wound. "Shit, fuck, holy _motherfucking shit_ , I know this hurts, but I can't let you die!" _I already did_. He's frantic, waving the other Losers over. "Keep your eyes open! No falling asleep, no passing out, no _dying_ , Eddie, no-“

And now the other Losers are sitting down, and Bev is touching Eddie's cheek - "Eddie, honey, just take deep breaths for me, okay?" - and they help Richie carry him into Bev's car. Richie squeezes next to Ben and Bill in the back, and he cradles Eddie's head in his lap, and Bev drives. Mike rides shotgun. They're all do

"Richie, was I dead?" Eddie is blunt. His breaths have little force, but they're _there_ , which is more than Richie could have ever hoped for.

He combs his fingers through Eddie's tangled hair, working through the knots. "It sure fucking looked like it," he says, his voice tight, and then he starts crying. "I'm sorry. I don't- fuck."

"You don't fuck?" A grin is tugging at the corners of Eddie's lips. "Thought you'd get a lot of women, being famous and all." Everything is blurry except for Richie's face above him. _If this is it,_ he decides, _if I don't make it to the hospital... I won't be mad. I'll be - well, not_ happy _, obviously, because I'd still die and I don't want to die, but... I'll be_ _okay, I think._

"Asshole. I'm gay. Remember?" Richie shakily laughs. 

"Gay for me." Eddie is full-blown smiling now. "’Cause I'm so hot."

Richie leans down and kisses him on the forehead. "Don't be full of yourself, fuckhead."

"Too late," mumbles Eddie. He blinks sluggishly, forcing himself to stay awake. "This is nice. You're so warm, and it... doesn't even hurt to breathe anymore. And your eyes are so fucking pretty. Don't know how I didn't notice it before. Guess it was kind of dark down there in the sewers, though." With his free hand, he grabs at the hem of Richie's shirt, using it as a sort of anchor keep himself grounded through the pain.

"Now I'm going to be the one full of myself." Richie pats the back of Eddie's hand, blushing furiously and freaking out inside because _Eddie fucking Kaspbrak, the love of my life, just called my eyes pretty_. "You're doing a good job, Spaghetti. Stay with me."

5\. They arrive at the hospital.

Mike gives the receptionist a bullshit explanation about a construction accident, and Richie feels sick again. He whispers a last "you can do this, Eds, I love you" into Eddie's ear before the doctors cart him off to surgery. Pacing around the waiting room, drumming his fingers on his thighs, Richie repeats Eddie's words to himself. _Eddie loves me,_ he thinks. _And Eddie will be okay. He has to be okay, because I don't know what to do with myself if he isn't. If he dies again, what next? I just go back to my life and act like a dumbass on stage, telling jokes that are clearly gross overcompensation for my sexuality? I keep my head down and don't ever get the balls to tell Steve that I want to write my own stuff? I go through hookup after hookup, each one with fluffy brown hair and breathing that's a little wheezy, to try and find a replacement for my childhood love? I start doing hard drugs again and eventually drink myself to death?_

The way it turns out is this: Eddie _is_ okay. The surgery goes well and when Richie is let in to see him, they kiss and hug and cuddle and they're both a mess of tears. Richie is all but climbing into the hospital bed. He can't stop touching Eddie's face and hair because this is _real!_ It's _real_ and Eddie's _alive_ and fuck, Richie is not going to waste this. He kisses Eddie's bare collarbone. "I love you."

"I love you too." Eddie can't move much without his stitches aching, but he manages to cup Richie's face in his hands. Never in his life did he think he would be deserving of this much love. Shit, he doesn't even think he deserves it _now._ "Wow, Rich, is this what I get for killing a fucking clown?"

Richie stiffens, oh-so-slightly. ".....Yeah."

"What the fuck was that? Why did you hesitate?" Eddie tilts his head. He suddenly feels very cold. "Oh fuck, is It alive again?"

"No!" Richie says, quickly. "No. But..." He trails off, tears springing to his eyes.

Eddie's face softens, and he can hear his heart beating in his ears. "Hey. I didn't kill It, did I?"

Richie shakes his head, and then presses his hands to his face. "No. Shit. I'm fucking- I'm sorry, Eds, I just- you looked so sad, and I... I wanted to give you... I don't know. Peace, I guess."

"It's alright." _I didn't kill It... but Richie loves me anyway._ "I died happy, because of you. I love you so fucking much."

"I love you too - and fuck, that's right, you fucking _died!"_ Richie seems a bit eager to change the subject. "How was Hell?"

Eddie weakly swats at him. "Fuck you, man. I didn't... there wasn't anything. I just remember everyone being around me, and you were holding my hand, and then we were outside. Sorry to disappoint you."

Silence.

Then, Richie says, "Was it. Um. Was it at least nice?" Tears begin rolling down his cheeks. "You just said you were happy, but were you really? Was it good? Did I do things right? I tried, I really did, I tried to make you not scared, and I-"

"Yes, you did everything right. It felt like falling asleep." Eddie kisses Richie's hand. "Hey, Richie?"

"Yeah, Eds?"

Eddie smiles. "We'll be okay."

And they are.


End file.
